Two items

At this moment, I am trying to memorize the difference between: 1.) the "ordinary magisterium," 2.) the "extraordinary magisterium," and 3.) the "ordinary universal magisterium." My reading has a diagram to help me with this. Never go to Jesus School.

Also, my mother told me the following story last week: "We [she and her sister and brother-in-law] used to go watch the river rats near the fire boats on the Calumet River. I mean, they were big. It was like an amusement park. Yes, the rats were running." I felt that several of you would appreciate this. My mom has a lot of childhood stories about rats.

Be still, my heart

Via Bleed Cubbie Blue, this item about Mike Fontenot's "star turn" on the sitcom My Boys is certainly the best thing I've heard all week:

Fontenot, a natural ham, was perfect for the part. He said he has seven lines overall and already has learned them..."I've been standing in front of the mirror rehearsing," [he said].

I don't know about all of you, but I'm prepared to be amazed.

"Nobody's got style"

I am slightly behind on everything Cubs-related because of midterms, but this is probably the best thing I have seen in 2009 so far, and I'm not really exaggerating.  I find it indescribably wonderful that they needed to put out a big Slip-n-Slide-looking thing so they could teach grown men how to fall on their faces without hurting themselves.  That is why baseball is America's pastime.

In other news: the blowout against the Sox yesterday was pretty cool, I hope Micah Hoffpauir keeps rocking on, I need to check out the audio on the Cubs/Padres matchup that I think is going on right now, and...Curt Schilling wants to pitch for the Cubs?  Huh.

Ashes

Man, I'm hungry.  I'm not very good at fasting.  I did get to hear a really extraordinary sermon this afternoon, though.  The priest said that "Ash Wednesday seems almost superfluous this year," which is undeniable.  He talked about our special responsibility to do good work in these bad times when the entire world seems to be degenerating into ashes and eventually concluded that we are not, in fact, doomed.  I desperately needed to hear that and cried, of course.

Well, since I am tired, hungry, and incoherent I will save commentary on the amazing Vine Line photoshoot of Z and Fontenot being "very playful" until later.  I hope all of you who observe Lent will have a peaceful and reflective forty days. 

Beat it

Lots of interesting stuff today.  The Tribune tells us that Z threw his first batting-practice session yesterday, then "bypassed the media and stomped out of the clubhouse shouting 'beat it' in Spanish."  Well, that's dispiriting, isn't it?  I hope we're not looking at a repeat of the second half of last season (I'd take a repeat of the no-hitter, of course, but mostly not the rest of it).

On a lighter note, Chicago Cubs Online linked to an entertaining Daily Herald article about the height of the Cubs' middle infielders, which begins, "After shooting his bow and arrow this winter, Mike Fontenot made it his target to get stronger so he can start at second base."  I'm not sure there was any need to go beyond the bolded part, personally - that is more than enough awesome for any piece of writing.  But if we must:

Both Fontenot and Miles check in at 5-feet-8, and when either pairs with shortstop Ryan Theriot (5-11), they'll give the Cubs one of the most diminutive double-play combos in the, ahem, "big" leagues.

Nice job, Daily Herald.  But, really, how great is it that our two potential second basemen are both 5'8?  What is this, the Little Rascals baseball club?  (Just kidding.  You know Theriot and Fontenot are my two favorite people ever, and I look forward to seeing Aaron Miles in action.)

I turned in a couple of sermons last week, have to talk to a bunch of people about baptism this week, and have 93 midterms due shortly, plus many terrible applications for financial aid, so I am more than usually grateful that baseball exists.  I'm clinging to it as a distraction from my FAFSA and various Latin terms.

"We got to get him a Cub hat over there"

More from the Sun-Times: I spent most of the long, cold winter pining away for articles like this one.

Cubs manager Lou Piniella does seem to take exception, though, to seeing the President wearing that old, worn Sox hat he does so often.

"We got to get him a Cub hat over there," Piniella said. "We can sneak Chief Wahoo over there."

Huh?

"Who is it?" Piniella said, grasping for the right character. "Yeah, Ronnie Wahoo."

Or maybe even Ronnie Woo-Woo. Close enough.

Please, Lou, never change.

News and Notes

According to the Sun-Times' Cubs Twitter feed and various other sources:

• With the arrival of Rami, D. Lee, and Soriano today, everyone is present and accounted for.  Man, that's exciting.  
• Jim Hendry doesn't know if Obama will pay a visit when he's in Mesa on Wednesday.  I hope so - maybe he could promote some inter-team goodwill.
• Lou has told everybody to quit making predictions about, you know, stuff, which I think is very sensible.
• Z's mustache: I am concerned.  Also, Milton Bradley continues to look crazy.

Spring is here

Via the official Cubs site:



Ladies and gentlemen, we are back.

HELP US

I should have posted this several days ago, but:




I have nothing to add. (Except that the photo is from the Sun-Times.)