Cubs rookie cards: sheer awesomeness

So, following up on my last post, I was inspired to see what kinds of Cubs rookie cards are floating around out there.  And, man oh man, happy birthday to ME.  This is some high-quality stuff.  I didn't include all of them - by which I mean, I didn't include the ones that aren't hilarious - but I think this is a pretty good selection.

The pitchers:

Hello, young man.

Awwwwwwwwwww.

This one's for you, Jessie.

This is extremely disturbing.

Not to mention this.  Jeez, what's with the bullpen?

Somewhat less terrifying without the nonsensical facial hair.

And of course, we can't forget about "Ted R. Lilly."  I wonder what the R stands for?  Oh...that's right.

The infielders:

Most of the newest cards, like Fukudome's and Marmol's, weren't especially funny.  But, wow, there's one major exception:

Ha ahahahahahahaha.  Gosh, I wonder why we used to think this man was all sleazy and stuff:

No comment necessary.

One of my favorites.

It's Captain America!

The outfielders:

Reed was deep in thought while swinging that bat, I guess.

I have one other picture of an outfielder, but I'm saving it for last, for reasons you'll understand when we get there.

Two gentlemen who aren't Cubs anymore but who I couldn't resist including:

::hearts::

I don't know WHAT this is all about, but I knew you guys needed to see it.

One person who has no connection to the Cubs at all, but I have a lot of love for the Rockies too, and this picture is something else:

Thanks for sharing that with the world, Matt.

And finally, the absolute highlight of this collection.  You need to prepare yourself for this one.

No, seriously.  Are you prepared?  Are you?

Let's just contemplate that for a moment.  Especially the little twinkling stars in the background.  Ah...yes.

Best birthday present EVER.